Say It with WHAAAAAT?

Hooligans, I can do nothing but present to you, this:

IMG_20130821_154238_725For those of you who, like me, are retinally-challenged, that right there is a no-shit STORE-BOUGHT card that says, no lie; “I Like Having Sex with You.”

YES.  Yes it does.

But it gets better.  Here’s the sentiment contained within this motherfucking treasure:

IMG_20130821_154510_228“Sometimes in this busy world, we forget to slow down for the special things that really matter – like having sex.  So today I’m just taking a moment to tell you how wonderful it is to have sex with you.  For even when we’re apart, I’m thinking of sex we’ve had in the past and looking forward to all the sex we’ve yet to share.  You’re a special person to me, and that’s why having sex with you is so very special, too!”

SERIOUSLY?

Do we really live in a world where such a card is necessary?  I always took it as a given:  If I’m CONTINUING to have sex with you, I must like it, right?  But the best part is the esoteric romance of it all: “For even when we’re apart, I’m thinking of sex we’ve had in the past and looking forward to all the sex we’ve yet to share.”  Back up, Shakespeare!  There’s a new sheriff in town!

So, Dear Sweet Mama and I were taken. the fuck. aback by this masterpiece of the greeting card art (which, interestingly enough, was being sold right next to the “I really fucked up and I’m sorry” section, leading one to believe these cards are often bought in a set).

So of course DSM bought one.

And gave it to the Concubine.

Who almost peed her pants.

MISSION. ACCOMPLISHED.

 

 

 

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13 Comments

Filed under Adventures with Dear Sweet Mama, Aw, La Vida Loca, Twu Wuuv, WTF???

13 responses to “Say It with WHAAAAAT?

  1. Hypothesis: That card was placed there by someone who created it on their very advanced home computer as a prank. And the store had no idea and just assumed it was there’s. That is the only logical explanation. It could not possibly be that Hallmark is smoking the ganga again. Oh, wait . . .

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  2. Damn, this whole time I thought I was showing Caveman how much I like having sex with him by actually having sex with him and being all, “fuck yeah, we’re having sex right now and I like that a lot”. I’ll try a card next time instead, I’m sure he’ll appreciate it way more.

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  3. DearSweetMama

    mistyslaws – my first thought as well, which is leading me to all kinds of mischeivious card thoughts – but there were several of those as well as a couple of different types of the same thought. Mind boggling. I now find myself wanting to give it to everyone I ever had sex with and even those I haven’t just because I love the “WTF?” face that comes (heh heh comes) with the first reading.

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  4. I took the cheap way out and handed my phone, with this blog on it, to The Boy and said “I mean every word.” We happened to be surrounded by his friends at a concert at the time.

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  6. flyingplatypi

    That’s perhaps the most epic card known to man… I want to give them out to everyone I know!

    Hugs!

    Valerie

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