Evidence for the Defence, Milord

(Because if I ever have to have an actual trial I want to have it in England because 1) Wigs and 2) Hot little Adama boy on Law and Order:  Great Britain and 3) FUCKING. WIGS.)

Anyhoo…

Y’all bitches may wonder why I am the way I am… I present (milord)

THINGS DEAR SWEET MAMA ACTUALLY SAID TODAY

1.  “Everything’s better with a little weenie.”

2.  “If I have to have rubbers, I’m gonna need the tall ones.”

In her “defence,” one statement referred to those pretzel-wrapped hot dogs you get at Auntie Anne’s, the other to those stupid short rainboots that keep your feet dry but fuck your ankles.  But STILL.  IN PUBLIC she says these things!

Oh, wait, one more:

3.  “Don’t you put that on Twitter!”

So I didn’t.  YOU’RE WELCOME.

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13 Comments

Filed under Adventures with Dear Sweet Mama, I'm Confused, La Vida Loca, WTF???

13 responses to “Evidence for the Defence, Milord

  1. Either way, the words of DSM carry much wisdom.

    Like

  2. Milord? How dare you address me as anything but milady. Off with your head.

    (Disclaimer: my understanding of how the UK justice system works may not be 100% accurate).

    Like

  3. I love DSM.

    And an aside- Law & Order- Great Britain? Is this real, or am I being gullible again?

    Like

  4. #2 referred to the pretzel didn’t it.

    Oh and p.s I’m back 😀

    Like

  5. I long for the days when my family wants to not put things on the Internet… As it is, they’re glad that at least I have friends on the Internet.

    Like

  6. DSM is a hero! ;0)

    Hugs!

    Valerie

    Like

  7. Pingback: When Hoody Ain’t Happy… | hoodyhoo

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