Hooody-hooooooooooooo, bitches! I’m finally getting back on my feet, living with Dear Sweet Mama and the Concubine on the Jersey Shore, no less, and I PROMISE I am getting back to blogging. First, a few things I have learned since moving up here:
1. Jets suck Knicks suck Mets suck. I am choosing to be a Yankees fan to keep my CT stepbrother, the Luke to my Leia, still talking to me. I will also be rooting for the Phillies since their farm team is down the road… and if you see Tim Tebow, tell him Jesus said GO GIANTS!!!
2. Jersey girls don’t pump gas. This is true. If you try to step out of your car at the gas station, a little Iranian man in an Exxon jacket comes screaming out of the station at you, yelling “Back in car, back in car!”
3. You can wear FUCKING ANYTHING here and no one bats an eye.
4. The word, “Ay!” is really the only communication most New Jersey natives have with each other. It covers all language needs and serves as a kind of Joisey Esperanto.
5. The Northeast has more fucking liquor stores than even I feel is appropriate.
More later, loves. I’ve missed you!