I am all crippled-up from my fit of house-cleaning yesterday (yeah, I let it get AWFUL and then basically murder myself in a big long marathon of cleaning — I feel better when I can see results, I guess!). So anyhoo, I was commenting to Chuckweasel that I was glad my therapy appointment is on Thursday instead of Tuesday this week, since I don’t think I’d be able to hobble my busted ass around downtown. Then it hit me:
MISS HOODY’S PLAN FOR SAVING
I said to CW, “If I had to go today, I’d have to pay a hobo to roll me around in his cart.” Then we fell to discussing how that’s probably okay, since hobos need money for booze and…. well, booze. So, the benefits of my plan are as follows:
- By paying a hobo $5 to push me around in a cart, I am providing gainful employment for hobos — job creation, bitches!
- This of course will stimulate spending, especially in the Mad Dog and Baked Beans sectors
- It will also keep hobos outta trouble, thereby freeing up police resources previously dedicated to breaking up Hobo Fights
- If the hobos DO fight, they will be in better shape from pushing me around in the cart and will therefore be less likely to be injured
- And best of all — IT’S GREEN. A hobo pushing me in a shopping cart produces MUCH less greenhouse gas than a car… mostly the only gas is bean-related
I’m awaiting my call from the Democratic National Committee. Hoody Hoo in 2012!