A Plot’s Afoot

Had to take poor Chuckweasel to the damn ER this weekend after Callie Jean tried to murder him.  You know how he’s allergic to cats but keeps giving me cats?  Well, my theory is, she sat her big white fluffy butt down on his head while he was sleeping… and so it goes.

He’s fine now, and in her defense, she was probably getting revenge for the fact that Chuckweasel peed on Ti-Jacques.  Apparently my spinster-lady-lifestyle has led to the cats not getting to see people pee standing up very often, and Ti-Jacques is fascinated by the toilet ANYWAY (he always tries to get down in it for no apparent reason).  So anyhoo, Ti-Jacques decided to try to “catch” the pee… and, well, the next thing I heard was Chuckweasel’s shocked scream “Ohmygawd!  I just peed on the cat!” 

I don’t think I was properly concerned… the unstoppable laughter probably gave that away.  And Ti-Jacques was fine, just… wet.  So every time he jumped onto Chuckweasel, Chuckweasel would freak out and put him in the floor, and I’m like, “Dude, it’s your own pee, I think it’s okay.”

Marceau and Ti-Jacques also like to run in and out of the shower as I’m using it, so they may just have a thing for water.  Callie Jean is NOT a fan, and Mina’s on the fence — she’s still emotionally scarred from the time she fell in the bathtub with me.

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41 Comments

Filed under Calpurnia Jean, Kittehs!, La Vida Loca, Twu Wuuv, White Man's Medicine

41 responses to “A Plot’s Afoot

  1. See, Ti-Jacques is probably trying to drink from it. I don’t know why, but clean water dishes are sometimes totally the opposite of what stupid contrary cats (whups, redundant statement) want to drink from. Mine seems to prefer the worst water in the house, which is either from a toilet, or from one of the duck weed/algae ponds outside…

    I guess you wouldn’t know, but was he trying to swat it? Because I can’t decide if the swatting the pee, or the jumping up in the air to catch it would be the funnier image. Either way, peed on cat is just hilarious.

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    • apparently he was batting at it, then sort of reached his arm (yes, I said arm) down into the bowl… I guess to see where it had gone? And all the cats really like to lick the shower after I get out… I guess that water is people-flavored?

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      • well, I know my cat thinks people are tasty. She likes licking me so much she actually licked the skin off the tip of my nose… I don’t think it’s affection, I think she’s trying to skin me because I’d be easier to eat that way.

        Cats totally have arms, mine uses her ‘front legs’ like arms too, she actually wraps them around my neck, or reaches up to be held … usually when she’s feeling exceptionally furry and my allergies are kicking in, but that’s a concidence, surely?

        The whole batting at the pee thing is still making me snigger actually… it’s so cute and disgusting at the same time…

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      • Um, so what you are saying essentially is that your cats are going to try to eat you as you sleep? Maybe that’s what callie jean was trying to do to Chuck.

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  2. I love that Jacques tried to catch the pee. Esme does that when I turn on the water to brush my teeth.

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  3. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA. Peed on the cat.

    I have a water-kitty, too. She jumps into the shower and sits there while I am cleaning myself. She hates the soap, though. She uses her arms to pick up food and open doors like the dainty lady she is. She has NOT however, gone after pee, although the boy cat apparently likes to watch men pee, and makes them nervous.

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  4. Might either of you have considered giving the wee peed upon kitteh a bath after the golden shower incident? Less freaking out when he tried to jump upon Chuck that way me thinks . . .

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    • Yeah, right — I ain’t about to try to bathe that wild little monster, especially when I was not responsible for the peeing! That’s what he has his brother for, is to wash his peed-on-self!

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  5. Monkey loves nothing better than post-shower water. And now that you mention the people-flavored thing, she might just be in training for that night when we’re really really soundly asleep.

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    • I’m telling you, Mina already licks so much it hurts, and she once tried to run away with a piece of sunburn skin that had peeled off. I took it away from her, I don’t want her to get used to the taste!

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  6. I don’t know how Chuckweasel feels about this, but urine is sterile. So if you pee on the cat, the cat is not only ok but everybody/thing around the cat is just peachy as well.

    Lila and Crystal like to watch me take a bath. It’s not so much that they like the water (and they don’t lick the tub afterwards), it’s more a sort of fascinated horror. “My God, she’s immersed! In the wet!” Sometimes one of them will leap up on the tub and sniff my head in concern. “You’ve been in there a while. You do know, that’s water? Water is BAD.”

    Callie Jean was probably getting revenge on Chuckweasel for bringing all those kittens into her life.

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    • That’s how Callie feels about the bath. She looks in the door, like, “Oh, crap, she’s DOING it again…” and acts all disgusted that I’m sitting in wet. And I think she’s gotten to be okay with the kittehs… as long as they know their place!

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  7. Kitten Thunder gets very excited when they are allowed into a bathroom with people because I leave the lids down all day – it keeps Oliver from falling in and drowning. I draw the line at them trying to stick their heads in there to see what I’m doing. No fuzzy heads in the crack, man. The Boy just doesn’t let them in with him.

    Obi loves to supervise showers. Especially in my shower because I have a clear shower curtain and a cloth one so he can be between them and not get wet. When shower supervision was Oli’s job he would sit at the far end of the shower – IN the shower – and look very concerned when a droplet came his way.

    He does NOT approve of baths. Neither do I, really. But he does think the bubble from oatmeal bubble bath is delicious.

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    • I also leave the lid down for precisely the same reason… and Ti-Jacques and Marceau don’t sit in the shower, they just run in and say “Hi, Mom!” and then run back out again. All 3 little kittehs like to watch a bath, though… just not Queen Callie Jean.

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  8. I don’t know if your cats are declawed or not…but if not the cat trying to “catch” the pee could have resulted in something much worse for Chuckweasel!

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  9. Im pretty sure peeing on cats is considered pussy abuse! Chuckweasel needs a return cat peeing on him… which one do you think would be up for the challenge?

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  10. Cats do hold a grudge. Mine’s still pissed because I accidentally shut his father’s tail in a door and it had to be amputated…twice.

    It was 15 years ago, let it go!

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  11. I have peed on cats several times. Never intentionally. Never peed and told, though.

    I once had a cat who would come into the bathroom when you were sitting down and try to stick her head in that space between your crotch and the front of the toilet seat.

    And that’s the end of my story. Hope Chuckweasel’s OK.

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    • There have already been several discussions about that front space and how we don’t stick our heads in there. And I think he’ll get through this, it just may take some time…

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  12. Everyone knows that water dishes are just for testing the floating capabilities of dry catfood. The good water is in the big porcelain chilled urn in the tiled room- if it wasn’t special, why would we have a lid on it? We are obviously saving the best for ourselves.

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  13. I love your cat stories. And your cat names. If Chuck’s going to complain about pee on a cat he should concern himself with the fact that they walk in their own pee-filled sandbox. Doesn’t bother me, but Hubby is super emotional about it. It’s a whole thing. I can’t even talk about it.

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  14. Freaking cats. So smart… and so not smart. I have to keep the toilet lid closed or Stewie will fall into it. INTO it. Ugh. Dummy.

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  15. My cats like shower-water too. And I don’t know why I’m telling you this, but Thunder likes to jump on my lap while I’m sitting on the toilet.

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  16. Norway

    My cat is an idjit. There are a lot of long winded stories I could tell, but most relevant is how he seems to have decided that the bathroom is HIS room. If you go in there without him, he knocks on the door until you let him in, and sulks if you don’t. If you let him in, the secret is that he really wants to be petted. In the bathroom. While you’re peeing. It’s one of his favourite things ever.

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  17. Oh my Goddess, you have a Pee-Paw! When I was in college, I had a friend who had a cat named Pee-Paw. He named the cat that because every time he went to the bathroom, the cat would follow him in, put his little front paw on the toilet seat, and try to bat at his pee stream. The crazy part was, the cat would never do it with regular water, just pee, lol.

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    • Now that the sink is disgusting dishes-free, Ti-Jacques has had a high ol’ time batting at the faucet water, too — I really ought to get off my ass and fix that drip, but he loves it so!

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