The Adventure Continues…

We last left Our Intrepid Heroine eating her weight in fried foods

Day 5 (Friday):  The morning trip down to the beach reveals there are no longer any LIVE jellyfish, just lots and lots of hunks of… I guess it’s their meat?  floating around in the water.  Which is gross, but shouldn’t be dangerous, right?  I mean, the stinging cells are in the tentacles, and this is just the blobby middle part, so it’s safe, right?  WRONG. 

Yeah, I went and swam through jellyfish meat and probably clouds of their invisible stinging babies AGAIN… resulting in the traditional “Is it summer yet?  Well, Hoody has a rash, so it must be,” discussion and in DSM referring to me and my jellyfish sensitivity being her “canary in the coal mine.”  Except she said parrot or some other bird, so it’s proably best her family comes from loggers, not miners.

So as the bad UV time approached, our intrepid party trekked back up to the condo, where I proceeded to make Hoody’s Most Wonderful Seafood Salad (you know, the one with the fake krab that’s so good I make it in my sleep?) for everyone to have for lunch (I’m the Queen).  Then it was back to the beach for a little while in the afternoon, then some pool time… and yeah, the rash was getting progressively worse, but fuck THAT.  The evening wrapped up with a delicious seafood meal (fried scallops and oysters and flounder and crabcake, OH MY!) at ECA’s favorite restaurant (I like some other ones better, but did I mention she’s set in her ways?).  Then Blind Lemon Cornpone (remember, my Cousin’s temporarily-blinded Wife?) made margaritas in the margarita machine (which seems to me to be a waste of both money — it’s really just a blender — and time — I can just drink out of the bottle, yo).  But they were tasty, and no one got so drunk they hollered, and we all sang “Put the lime in the coconut” around the kitchen, so all was well.

Dammit, already getting too long again!  Hopefully I’ll be able to wrap all this up tomorrow… Day 6 is when SHIT STARTS TO GO DOWN!



Filed under Adventures with Dear Sweet Mama, La Vida Loca, On the Road Again, White Man's Medicine

20 responses to “The Adventure Continues…

  1. Do we get a recipe for that fake krab Salad? I like me some fake krab.

    (I first typed “fake krap” TWICE.)


    • probably “krap” is accurate, since it’s guaranteed to have absolutely no nutritive value whatsoever… but SHIT BE GOOOOOD! And probably once I finish the Saga itself, I’ll do a post on all the tasty recipes we consumed!


      • I think it’s actually made of seaweed, which means that it’s good. If you ate only seaweed and green tea for the rest of your life you would live forever. Right?

        Did you get the rash to go away?


        • I’m pretty sure you’re right — there may be some actual fish in “surimi” but it’s for DAMN sure not crabmeat! And the rash is better thanks to a round of prednisone… although I think I may try to get another round to make sure!


  2. I have gone to the tropics twice now and HOPED to see a Jelly….and I have yet to see one…I’m so sad!


    • good GAWD, don’t be — they’re awful and they HATE us for all our spine-having ways. If you must see one, screw the tropics, just go the the US Eastern Seaboard (about Virginia to South Carolina in my own experience, never seen ’em lower than Myrtle Beach) between late June and the end of August — ENJOY!

      Or just come swimming with me. They’ll show up, even if we’re in an indoor pool!


  3. Damn jellyfish. I hate those little suckers.


  4. I’m 1000% content with just having seen jellies behind glass at the aquarium. In prison where they belong.


  5. I don’t even know how you can get in the water with jellyfish meat. I’d be running screaming up the beach.

    A margarita machine actually sounds like a good idea to me. I’ve toasted at least 2 blenders in my quest for something that crushes ice.

    I’ll be waiting with bated breath to find out how your rash progresses.


    • I actually have an ice crushing machine that DSM and I got a long time ago when we were even bigger alcoholics… but I usually go with on-the-rocks these days because frozen makes my teeth hurt!


  6. Yeah, I don’t like beaches. There’s too much… sand. It gets frickin’ EVERYWHERE.

    This is why I can’t take a NICE vacation somewhere where cabana boys will run over and fetch me another pina colada when I raise my empty glass and snap my fingers, and end up hiking in the woods where the moose want to kill me.


  7. Thanks for the PSA. I’m going to the beach next week and will be sure to watch out for those suckers. I hate those beasts. Their only purpose is to sting and make everyone generally miserable. Did DSM at least have the decency to pee on the rash while she was making fun of you? I’m just saying, it’s supposed to make it feel better. Maybe you have to be drunk enough on margaritas for that to seem like a good idea? Oh, or maybe that is part of the saga of Day 6. I am anxiously awaiting the final reveal!


    • Having been stung enough to probably qualify for super-powers (I’m waiting, Professor X!), I can tell you: The pee thing is BULLSHIT. I think it was made up by sick fuckers who have that pee fetish as an excuse to pee on strangers at the beach!


  8. You know we’re only being silent about our envy while we wait for the Shit To Go Down. I mean…. oysters. Mmm, and scallops. And margaritas.
    Hurry up, STGD Day.


    • now that I’m home, I’m having baaaaad seafood withdrawal… enough to be considering a meal at the “Fresh Seafood Market” restaurant down the street… yes, it says “fresh seafood” and Wes’BYGAWD Virginny has no sea…


  9. Pingback: STGD Day | hoodyhoo

  10. Pingback: Chow Down, Bitches! | hoodyhoo

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