I’m still on my Granny Weatherwax high horse about this stupid weather (flurries? Did the guy just say FLURRIES?) and it reminded me about what I guess we’ll have to call the Weaselian Calendar (like the Julian calendar, but this one’s from Chuckweasel).
Now, as geeks like myself know, when Julius Caesar (great general, bad haircut) switched the Roman Empire from the lunar calendar to the solar one, he had to add a lot of time to catch up so the seasons would be in the right place. So you wouldn’t be having a Harvest Festival in 2 feet of snow, or what have you. Chuckweasel (who is a closet geek but pretends to be a jock) has a theory that we’ve gotten the seasons out of alignment again and we need another adjustment.
What Caesar and Company did was, they had November 3 times in a row. Which was cool, because it gave the Romans yet another opportunity to act completely bugshit crazy (some of them repeated every “day” by doing EXACTLY the same thing on every “November 4th” or whatever; others decided that 2 of the months didn’t “count” and they took a do-over). I think we could totally use this idea, and maybe it would help the economy, too!
Bear with me here. If we do November 3 times, you would make your November car payment, rent payment, etc. during the “first” November. Then you should not have to pay your November bills again in the next 2 months, because they’re still, technically, “November.” If we can get everybody to agree to this, we would not only fix our calendar so the weather’s in the right places, we’d also give everybody a chance to save up a little money and get caught up! GENIUS!!!!!
If anyone needs me, I’ll be at home, waiting for President Obama to call. Or the Nobel Committee. Or probably just Dear Sweet Mama, but a girl can dream!