Okay, I get it. Very funny.
Last night, I was playin’ with makeup (like ya do) and decided to see if I was still any good at bruises (just go with it, I’m weird). So I gave myself 2 black eyes and a broken nose and MAN! It looked SWEET! That’s when I called Chuckweasel to tell him what I’d done… and that’s when I made the suggestion that I would have to pay for later.
I asked if he thought it would be okay for me to be a Poorly-Behaved 1950’s Housewife for Halloween. I have the perfect dress, and well, these great BRUISES, see? And he said no, Hoody, you’re being inappropriate (again), why don’t you try to turn it into zombie makeup? And I didn’t have the heart to tell him, zombies don’t bruise, bruising requires a functioning circulatory system… his education is sorely lacking.
But apparently he was right, and I WAS being inappropriate (again), because this morning the universe decided to teach me a lesson. I was getting out of the shower and my foot slipped on the wet floor and I busted the HELL outta my knee. So now when I get home and take my pants off, I will have a massive REAL bruise to remind me that assault isn’t funny, Hoody. And the worst part is, the floor wouldn’t even have BEEN so wet if I hadn’t got out of the shower once previously to check and make sure I’d washed all the makeup off.
So, yeah, entirely karma this time, although I am prone to serious shower-related injuries… I actually cracked a bone in my foot getting out of the shower once, beat THAT!