You know “Jersey Shore” is getting even more fucked-up when the Trollkin-Weeble hybrid getting arrested is NOT the most white-trash part of the episode! The Scary-Titty One PEED in the FLOOR? SERIOUSLY???
(BTW, I do know their names, I just think my names for them are better)
WHAT THE HELL, MAN? I mean, I have peed in a lot of places — as a small child, I was forever embarrassing Dear Sweet Mama by walking into a business and announcing, “Hey, I’ve peed here!” What can I say, I’m a fan of the public restroom, yo. And back in my “drankin'” days — you know, as opposed to “drinking” which is concerned with being social, whereas “drankin'” is entirely based on quantity… anyhoo, one time back in college when I had gotten my “drank” on, I did indeed pee in a Bob Evans parking lot (in my defense, it was located between the bar and my car and EVERYTHING WAS CLOSED, MAN! I had no choice!). I will even admit, one time after I fell in the creek while canoeing and my jeans got too wet and shrinky to get off… I may have indeed peed the jeans (I was probably CWI — Canoeing While Intoxicated — which is really the only way to avoid the great black-hole of suck that canoeing entails).
But STILL? In the FLOOR??? OF THE BAR??? Seriously, Scary-Titty-Girl, somebody has to clean that up!
Oh, wait. You sprayed it with seltzer. Yeah, that makes it fine.