Alright, kids… I feel we know each other well enough now that I just can’t keep this from you any longer… Here goes.
My name is HoodyHoo… and I watch “Jersey Shore.”
Actually, to be completely honest… I DVR it, because I can’t stand the thought of missing an episode.
I know, I know, you’re disappointed. but come on, I’m only human! And it’s not like I watch a lot of reality TV — I only watched “Survivor” for a little bit of the first season (until it became clear no one was going to kill and eat anyone else), I don’t watch any of the “So You Think You Can Be the American Idol With the Stars” crap about people dancing or singing or what have you. I’m not really into the “competition” aspect… I just wanna see people act like trash. And “Jersey Shore” fills that void quite nicely.
Besides, the show is serving a valuable purpose. Without “Jersey Shore,” how would we ever teach future generations the proper use of the phrase “Oh, no she di’unt!” “See, Petey, how that short misshapen girl who looks like a Trollkin had sex with a Weeble Wobble is flailing her arms and telling the cop to fuck off? Well, if you were standing nearby, you would say, ‘Oh, no she di’unt!” This would both let the officer know you could serve as a potential witness AND let everyone around you know that you were not associated with that girl.” That’s PARENTING, folks!
P.S. My Dennis Quaid reference in the last post (which actually ended up turning into a “Man, I’m old” reference when nobody got it) was about the movie Dreamscape, in which Dennis Quaid is some kind of psychic who can get into people’s dreams and save them from the evil psychics who are trying to use the dreams to kill them. So Dennis Quaid should have showed up in my dream dressed as a cop and pretended to take me off for “interrogation,” but really he would be rescuing me from the Home for Wayward Teens… now if you’ll excuse me, I think I’m having a different kind of dream about Dennis Quaid in a cop uniform…
PPS: I got distracted… so anyway, I made a reference about the movie Dreamscape and then guess what was on the TV this weekend??? I AM THE MASTER OF THE TV!
PPPS: I also dreamed recently that Dwayne Johnson moved in across the street from me and Chuckweasel and was very depressed, so we went over to his house and I cooked him some scrambled eggs. So, basically, I can smell what the Rock is cookin’… and it’s scrambled eggs. With American Cheese in them, ’cause that’s nature’s Prozac.