The Theatre of My Life

An Imaginary Conversation Between Myself and the Fuckers at the Cable Company:

Cable Company:  We want some money.

Hoody Hoo:  Ain’t got any.

CC:  You just got paid!

HH:  Rent comes first, bitches.

CC:  Fine, when can we have some money?

HH:  Maybe next week.

CC:  Why maybe?

HH:  If nothing else comes up, you can have some money.  So maybe.

CC:  Well, we’re gonna turn your shit off!

HH:  Go ahead.

CC:  We’ll turn off your cable!

HH:  I’ll read.

CC:  We’ll turn off your internet!

HH:  I’ll use it at work.

CC:  We’ll turn off your phone!

HH:  Good, no one ever calls except fuckers like you asking for money.

CC:  Oh no, you’ll still get incoming calls.

HH:  FUCK.

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4 Comments

Filed under I'm Confused, Reality Bites, WTF???

4 responses to “The Theatre of My Life

  1. Tell them you want to switch to paperless billing. When they cut off your internet access, you can tell them you can’t access the bill. Suck it, cable company.

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  2. ahaha brilliant! great idea alonewithcats and you’ve gotta admire the CC’s incoming calls line..I wonder if that’s taught in training.

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    • All the time with the “Gimme my money, gimme my money.” Honestly, it’s like talking to your pimp! If you had a pimp, not that I have one or even would need one… and I don’t even know what one is… dammit.

      Like

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