Twilight Zone

So, here’s the Mike Sorrentino, Hooligans:

SCENE:  INT.: HOODY’S ROOM, EVENING:

Dear Sweet Mama:  Hey, Hoody, could you get my clothes out of the dryer?

Hoody:  Sure, no problem.  Are they dry now?

DSM:  Yeah.

INT.:  LAUNDRY ROOM,  LATER:

Hoody is folding clothes.  DSM walks by.

DSM:  You don’t have to fold them!

HH:  Of course I do, that’s part of “getting them out of the dryer.”  It’s no biggie.

<MOMENTS LATER>

The Concubine walks past the door, sees Hoody folding clothes.

TC:  I had things in there!

HH:  Yeah, I know, I was just folding -

TC:  Are they dry?  Okay.

The Concubine then proceeds to gather up the clothes Hoody has not yet folded, and storm off into her bedroom.

WHA WHA WHAAAAAAAAT?

Seriously, bitch?  I’m not allowed to FOLD YOUR CLOTHES??? Get the fuck over yourself, hon.  It’s called doing you a favor.  And don’t look now, I also switched your wet clothes from the washer to the dryer.  Yeah, I’m such a cunt like that.

Okay, kids:  Discuss.

 

14 Comments

Filed under Adventures with Dear Sweet Mama, C'est Vrai You Suck, I'm Confused, La Vida Loca, Reality Bites, WTF???

14 responses to “Twilight Zone

  1. She didn’t want you to fondle her unmentionables, is all.

    And yeah, taking MY clothes out of the dryer involves folding, but anyone else is on their own. They get the pile on top of the dryer routine. I ain’t nobody’s maid, damnit.

    Like

  2. Taking my clothes out of the dryer doesn’t involve folding – I heap mine on the spare room bed, fulling intending to fold them later. Anyone elses? I fold. Go figure.

    Like

  3. I used to live in an apartment building with a common laundry room. I’ve actually lived in a bunch of places like that, and the one thing they all have in common is that there are never enough dryers. So if someone’s not there when their dryer stops, there’s a good chance that someone else will take their clothes out.

    One time when I went to get my clothes out of the dryer, they’d already been taken out and folded. By a complete stranger. It was considerate and a little creepy at the same time.

    Like

  4. DearSweetMama

    Keep folding my clothes, my love. Prepare my food. Walk my dogs. Make the bed. Anything your little heart desires. And bring me a margarita so I can enjoy watching you do these things.

    Like

  5. Rosie

    I can only imagine what she had in there, that she didn’t want you to see!

    Like

  6. Everyone knows that “getting things out of the drier” includes folding…

    And sniffing.

    Hugs!

    Valerie

    Like

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